Great Comebacks

[smartnhappy]

I pulled into get fuel today, across from a blinged-out Ford Excursion. He laughed and synically said my car was almost as big as his truck. I said no, my car was almost as big as his gas tank......shut him right up.

Later in line to pay, he asked me how much it took and I said $13 dollars filled it up. I asked him how much his fillup totalled and he said "$92 dollars, but that'll take us all the way to Montreal". I paused for a moment to do some mental math, then said "my fillup will take me all the way to Montreal too, but for $92 dollars I could go to Montrael 7 times".

This had the whole Esso station snickering.

Felt good !!

Lucid moments that get the upper hand seem fewer and farther apart as I get older, so when I have a good one I want to share it with an appreciative audience.

Any other good comebacks that anyone has come up with lately ????

[serpicosteve]

Some guy said" hey look at the small car", then I ran him over.....hehehehehehe that showed him!

[Guest PhilDuPerv]

This happened a while back but still makes me giggle

This is a conversation I got into one evening when trying to purchase my fuel on the way to work ...it went along the following line .

Spotty Garage Youth :- Thats not yours that smart car is it ?

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Why whats wrong with them ? "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Oh I just hate em mate I think they're sh1t ... no offense like "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " None taken mate ... which one did you test drive ? "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Eh ? "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Well I assume that seeing as you say they're sh1t you had taken one for a test drive and came to that conclusion "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Nah mate its just that they're tiny like . "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Oh right I see so whos have you been a passenger in then ?"

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Eh ?"

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Well you say that they are Tiny and I was just wondering which one you had been inside of cos mine has plenty of room in the front "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " No I havent been in one I just think they look tiny on the outside "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Oh really thanks for that couldnt say I had notice that before you mentioned it.

Spotty Garage Youth 2 (who until now had gone unmentioned) :- " Well I saw em on Top Gear the other night and they said that they were slow and crap handling "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Yep thats a fair accesment if not somewhat limited a little , but if I wanted speed and handling I would take my bike out "

Spotty Garage Youth : "yer but theres no like room in the boot "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Once again a correct observation , but I dont need much room in the back , if I did I would use my large car "

Spotty Garage Youth :- "So if that little car is so good why do you have the bike and the car"

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Well the bike I have because I am a biker , and lot of my social life is based around bikes , the Meriva I have for the Mrs to use and also for moving stuff and people arround in , the Smart I have for fun , its my play thing , its brings me a smile just by driving it , gets a reaction where ever I go , and its not like any of the other steel boxes that all look the same as each other. "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Well I dont think they really stand out ! "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Really ! Okay then there are around 6 cars on the forecourt now we know you noticed my car but can you name another one of them without turning round ?"

Spotty Garage Youth :- "Er dont know . Any way I wouldnt drive one cos thay look ugly "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " In that case I hope that you never meet a girl with your attitude cos if thats the case your never going to get a sh@g "

Spotty Garage Youth 2 :- " Yep hes got a point there ****** ( name removed to protect the stupid ) , thats probably why your still a virgin "

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " Anyway you two guys seem to know a lot about quality vehicles what do you drive ? "

Spotty Garage Youth :- " Err nothng yet , cant afford it "

Spotty Garage Youth 2 :- "Pegeot Streetfighter" ( moped to those not in the know ).

Phil the dashing Smart owner :- " ah in that case I bow to both of your's superior knowledge "

And with that I paid my ?20 for a full tank of juice and proceeded to leave the building.

See this is the type of thing that makes me glad to have a smart , would have missed this if I had a corsaastrasaxo .

[Duck]

Pitty you couldn't have worked "Not a saussage" somewhere into the convo.... tee hee!!

-Iain

[Speedie]

Wife said a guy at work was going on how a smart was zipping around all the traffic on the way into work - I told her she should have piped up "and he was getting great mileage too!".

Cheers,

Cameron

American tourists? Smile and wave......

[pulsating]

It's getting harder these days to come up with witty retorts, because everyone is so positive about the car all the time! Haven't heard a "shoulda bought a Harley" quip for ages...

[collude]

Some guy said" hey look at the small car", then I ran him over.....hehehehehehe that showed him!

Lol that's the funniest thing I've read all day.